Relationship Trust

Relationship trust is something that over the years I have spent a great deal of time researching. Exactly what is relationship trust really and how can we achieve it? What does it really feel like to live in a trusting relationship and what is it actually like to have this type of dynamic?

Asking each other the really important fundamental life questions is a great way to achieve deeper levels of relationship trust. Simply being open to exploring your answers with you partner in itself takes a degree of trust, this facilitates the growth of trust in general in your relationship.

The book  1000 Questions For Couples  picture above, was written with 'realationship trust' in mind and is, in my opinion, an excellent starting place for the endeavour of relationship trust. Its structure of questions divided into different gategories helps you to 'get the ball rolling' by just selecting a question from a certain category, taking turns at asking and answering. Also, you can learn a lot by any reticence your partner or yourself may have to answering certain questions, silence can speak volumes!

I have discovered that the trust we have in our partners  is really a confidence in their ability to treat us in a way that demonstrates their love for us. Therefore it is the foundation on which we can build a strong, enjoyable, and loving relationship. Many people equate relationship trust with the ability to believe that our partners will be faithful with regard to sex and yes, of course this is a part of a trusting relationship, but it is also in fact a much smaller part than we are often led to believe.

A greater part of relationship trust is being able to count on our partners to always have our best interests at heart in all they say and do. This in turn frees us up to develop relationship trust more fully and concentrate our energies on all that we are passionate about in life, which obviously includes our husbands, wives and family. 

If both people then have this confidence in each other, the love and respect they feel for themselves and their partner will support and strengthen their relationship on a continual basis. This in turn allows them as a couple to pursue their dreams and ambitions in the full knowledge that they do have relationship trust and that their partners love and approve of them because they have full confidence in their thoughts, decisions and actions.

When as couples we have this basis of trust in our relationships, we rarely have to put in much effort to enjoy our lives with each other, this leaves us plenty of time and space to explore other aspects of ourselves and our partners.

Often the question of whether we do have relationship trust and indeed what and whether we should trust, can frequently arise in several everyday situations, leaving people continuously wondering "can I trust her in this situation?" or "should I trust him to do what he promised?" etc. A foundation of trust, built on the knowledge that each of us can have confidence in the others ability to think and act in ways that demonstrate their love for us, removes the need for such ponderings.

Our challenge therefore is to learn how to set up the dynamic of relationship trust at the begining and also how to create it in our existing relationships, after all what point is there for us to be together if not to develop a deeper more trusting relationship with a chosen 'someone' than we can with people in general?

Relationship trust is not about making decisions in separate situations on individual matters, but more an all-encompassing mutual feeling of wellbeing in that whole area of our partnership, which helps to produce and maintain healthy and enjoyable relationships and happy and fulfilled couples.

A great way to lay a foundation for relationship trust, is to really know and understand how and what our partners think and also how they feel in as many areas of their lives as we can. This does not mean we have to be intrustive, but as couples who love each other and want to share our lives we should be willing to reveal as much of ourselves as possible for the other person to truly be able to love and respect us.

Michael Webb's  book  '1000 Questions For Couples,  which I mentioned earlier, is a relationship users manual to help partners ask the right questions in the right way and have a little fun at the same time. It's a great aide to building relationship trust, so if you think your relationship would benefit from a structured couples guide like this please read the '1000 Questions For Couples'  Review  on this site.